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Reader Comments (86)

Posted: Nov 4th 2010 3:55PM Interitus said

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It's a print ad for the laxative Dulcolax
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Posted: Nov 4th 2010 4:09PM mttgamer said

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Some how I seriously doubt that...
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Posted: Nov 4th 2010 4:20PM Colin said

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No seriously, it is.
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Posted: Nov 4th 2010 5:18PM Interitus said

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Why don't you do a google image search for "Dulcolax rats" so you can feel like a fool. Why would I make something like that up?
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Posted: Nov 5th 2010 3:12AM Joystiq Login Bugs SUCK said

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Wow.

What drugs was the Ad exec smoking when he linked a laxative to rats running away.

Armageddon!
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Posted: Nov 5th 2010 7:43AM Drakkon said

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The rats look like the same ones from Ratatouille. At least the models look the same. Not sure about the still frame context because I never saw the movie (just bits and pieces) .
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Posted: Nov 5th 2010 9:17PM (Unverified) said

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I got no idea, but try using reverse image search, as I did here:
http://www.tineye.com/search/a65f23af72cdebfc1e2bd3c35140ec757a439300/

One of the images locations gotta have the source.
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Posted: Nov 5th 2010 9:18PM (Unverified) said

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Try going to tineye and searching on the image. One of the locations it popups up on gotta mention the source.
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Posted: Nov 4th 2010 3:47PM (Unverified) said

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Wow you guys just had a Nergasm, proving how smart you are. Great article!!

Posted: Nov 4th 2010 3:49PM (Unverified) said

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Actually, the whole mages in cloth thing probably goes back to the D&D days. Wizards wear cloth because heavier armor restricts movement and would interfere with the casting of complex spells, which require intricate hand movements, vocal incantations and sometimes physical reagents.

There are plenty of high-DPS classes that wear plate, so it's not a balance thing.

Posted: Nov 4th 2010 3:51PM Wilhelm2451 said

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I cannot believe you made the insect/arachnids mistake. Any perceived mistake on that front brings the entomologists out in force. It is more predictable than Godwin's Law.

And what about Children's Week in WoW? How does that fit into your scheme of things?

Posted: Nov 4th 2010 4:03PM (Unverified) said

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Wilhelm: Gnomes. As I said, it's a conspiracy.
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Posted: Nov 4th 2010 3:52PM Rollins said

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As an ambassador from a realm similar to that which you call Azeroth, I believe I can answer your questions.

1) If you had an endlessly regenerating supply of food, you'd get big too. Think about all of the smaller insect trash mobs that just keep regenerating over and over. Pfft, evolution.

2) It's the Inverse Protection Law of Female Armor: if you are female, the more you reveal yourself, the less susceptible you are to damage. Seriously, if you're female and wearing a full suit of body armor, the aforementioned giant spider will be able to rip through it like paper.

3) No one wants the Black Plague to happen in an idealistic fantasy world. Ten is simply an equitable number for every adventurer to kill. Easier to remember than nine or eleven, and twelve is simply too many.

4) Unfortunately, every single magical element is terribly prone to being conducted by the materials that heavier armors are made out of. The heavier your armor, the more your magical essence just gets absorbed. I didn't make the rules!

5) Wizards may be incredibly brilliant when it comes to casting spells, but they're as dumb as a box of multi-colored rocks when it comes to everything else. To them, fire/earth/wind/water are like the ABC's. Easy to remember. God help them if they try to spell words using more than one of them.

6) Actually, pain in fantasy realms feels really, really good. Why do you think tank classes exist? And if pain is that good, imagine what death feels like!

7) If you ever tasted a health potion, you'd know why you wouldn't want to drink them. A hacked-off limb might be preferable.

8) Blame the endlessly regenerating monsters. I mean, it takes the work of ten adventurers just to keep one farmer's field from being overrun! And it's not like the monsters ever stop and go away. They just spawn over and over and over again.

9) You're actually not far off with the Norse afterlife explanation. Also, no eating or drinking = no bathroom breaks. Potions are 100% absorbed into the body. Ditto all other consumables.

10) No one's having sex, either. And who needs kids? You can't die, after all.

I hope this helps you with your quandary. Our world may seem quite alien to you, but it runs by completely consistent and logical laws, just like yours.

Kind of.

Posted: Nov 4th 2010 3:57PM (Unverified) said

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Why would your world seem alien to a blogger who writes about MMOs?
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Posted: Nov 4th 2010 4:48PM Rollins said

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Well, I suppose it's less alien to him than most. Still, I get weirded out every time I cross a street and actually have to seriously worry about getting hit by a car.
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Posted: Nov 4th 2010 3:55PM (Unverified) said

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Also, in regards to the whole trauma of death thing, imagine what it's like to be a tank. You stand in front of his huge monster. He strikes you hard enough to bring you within an inch of your life. You are bleeding, limbs are severed, lungs are punctured, etc. Then, magically, you are mended, completely whole again, only to be struck AGAIN. Repeat until the boss is dead. Thousands of times.

Tanks would all be alcoholics. :)

Posted: Nov 4th 2010 5:10PM BlindseerJB said

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All the good tanks I know are alcoholics!!
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Posted: Nov 9th 2010 4:10PM Chadrassa said

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And all the while the only thing you are able to see?

The crotch of the mob.

I want to be a psychotherapist in an mmo. I would be stinking rich.
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Posted: Nov 4th 2010 4:02PM DancingCow said

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I agree with most of this, but if you think the four elements can be attributed to Captain Planet....

.... you'd be ignoring a bucketload of history.

I won't ramble about this, but just take 10 seconds to google and you'll spot this wikipedia entry:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Classical_element

Magical / philosophical systems based around those 4 elements (or those 4 four plus ether) can be found across many cultures going back thousands of years. The Chinese system of the elements is the only divergence.

This particular RPG staple is based in "reality".

Posted: Nov 4th 2010 4:02PM Stormwaltz said

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Vendors have the money and the desire to buy every piece of random crap I pick up ("The ancient Sword of Lost Light forged by the Divine Empyrean? Sure, I'll give you 8 silver for that. Four hundred cow hides? Thirty silver, and not a copper more!").

...and yet, only a handful of vendors in the entire world ever sell anything.

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